DEAR MISAO
by flori-dono

DISCLAIMER: This is a Rurouni Kenshin inspired fanfiction. Standard disclaimers 
apply. 

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I got this idea from an EVA fic... it was something LETTER, heck 
I forgot... niweys, I put this down to say that this is not exactly a very 
original idea (as far as fanfiction is concerned). Aoshi's very OOC here.


Dear Misao,

I don't intend for you to read this letter, much alone get a hand on it. Then 
why bother writing, perhaps you ask. Well, its all for the peace of mind. It 
seems that even meditation can't get rid of this thing that has been gnawing at 
me for a long time now. I had to get this out, or I would lose my sanity 
instead. I would've wanted to say this in person but you know me, I'm not good 
at talking, I'm not good with words. I'm afraid that I'll utter things that are 
the opposite of what I really mean to say. I don't want to see you cry again. I 
don't want to see you get hurt because of me, just like the time when I almost 
killed Okina. I almost turned back, but I didn't. And I know you must have hated 
me for it, and perchance, you may still.  

I don't blame you. What I did was unforgivable. Misao, I promised your father 
that I would protect you, no matter what. And I'm so sorry for not fulfilling 
that promise. I don't think I'm worthy to be your guardian. How can I be, when I 
can't even protect you from myself?

What I'm trying to say here is that I love you. For years I have been. I often 
tell myself that I am too old for you, that you're just a kid. But still the 
feeling persists. And Kami-sama knows how hard I tried to fight it, how hard I'm 
still trying to fight it. I know I am not worthy of your love, you deserve so 
much more. You deserve someone who can bring you happiness. And that, Misao, I 
can not give.

It hurts to find out that I can not have you. And it hurts more that if I do, I 
will only see you in pain. 

Misao, I would like you to know that if ever you find someone you can love as 
much as I love you, it's fine by me. I love you that much.

As for me, seeing you happy would make me happy too.

Take care Misao, I love you.  


Aoshi

***
"Otousan!" Hana-chan said. "Okaasan's crying!"

Aoshi looked up from his paperwork to see a tear-streaked face before him.

"Misao?"

"I love you too, baka!" she said and sobbed in his chest.
Aoshi noticed the faded paper in her hand. He smiled. 

"So she has found it after all these years," he thought.

Aoshi put his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"I love you, Misao."

*OWARI*